It would be easy to describe last Tuesday as the worst day in my life up until this point. Not only did the election go in a direction that I still find unimaginable, but I found out that my liposarcoma has returned.
I don't want this to be a political post, but my biggest fear about the election was tied directly to the ACA. While the ACA hasn't really been affordable for me (we have spent over $30K on premiums plus out of pocket expenses in 2 of the last 4 years), I have taken solace in the fact the people who couldn't get insurance before were getting it now. My insurance company doesn't want to cover me (two primary cancers in the past 3 years) and they don't want to cover my wife (another primary cancer in between my two diagnoses) and they most likely don't want to cover my children, who are both 18+.
To get the care that I need for a very rare cancer, I am doing most of my treatment at Sloan Kettering in NYC. While this is expensive for me - lots of travel expenses - I have access to docs there who truly understand the cancer I'm dealing with now. If I could only go to hospitals here in VT, I'd have little hope of a positive outcome. It's not that they are bad docs, but rather that my diagnosis is so rare and so dangerous that I need true specialists in this disease, and that's not what I have here in VT.
So, if the ACA is repealed completely and not replaced, I'm likely a dead man. If the pre-existing conditions clause is not maintained, I'm a dead man. So, I had a very vested interest in the outcome of the election.
Regretfully, my new tumor is at a tough spot - behind the liver, near the spine, near the diaphragm, and possibly entwined with the inferior vena cava. This would be very difficult to simply cut out, so my surgeon wants me to do a week of high dose radiation, wait six weeks, and then have surgery. He said it's still a significant surgery, but if no other lesions show up, hopefully, I will have a smaller incision and easier recovery than the last 2 times.
It also means that for the 3rd time in 4 years, my ski season will be interrupted, and I will be unable to perform my normal job as an instructor. I will still ski and teach, but I'll simply have to fit in as many days as possible.
Most likely, I'll be in NY for a radiation simulation next week. Then, radiation the week of 12/5. Then, a break for 6 weeks or so. Another CT scan. And then, most likely, another surgery in late January.
It's a tough blow. It probably means that any modest hopes I had for a cure are now gone. Maybe, but it's just not very likely. The surgeon is confident that we can still achieve some sort of longer-term remission, but I'm skeptical. This does happen for some people, but not for others.
My biggest concern, to be honest, is how each round of treatment just chips away at me, both physically and mentally. Each round creates a few more permanent side effects. Each round shakes me up mentally. And, for me, each round gets tougher to take. In the past 3 years, I've now had a major biopsy, laparoscopic surgery, major surgery, 4 rounds of inpatient chemo, another major surgery, and I'm now looking at a week of radiation and then another surgery. Mentally, I simply feel beaten down. I've talked about just skipping the treatments, although I do know very well what that would mean.
So, for now, I'd say I'm down, but I'm not out. I will fight on.
Tuesday, November 15, 2016
Thursday, October 27, 2016
Ghost Train Race Report
I don't even remember the last time I used the phrase "Race Report" in a subject line. My last marathon was 5 years ago, and my last ultra was a DNF (timed out midway) in a 50K - 6 years ago.
Last winter, during chemo, I floated the idea of an ultra to my wife. There was (and still is) so much uncertainty related to my liposarcoma, and I needed to plan something. Mentally, I needed to know that I could still plan ahead in my life, prepare for something, and have it happen. It might not make sense to most people, but I'm sure every cancer patient would understand.
My first thought was to do the 50K at the Maine Track Club 50K/50M. This has been a favorite race of mine in the past, but I found out that it's now been discontinued. My thought was that I could do 50K in the 50 mile time limit, so I could finish. With that race gone, my options seemed more limited.
I briefly considered A Race For The Ages, but that was more than I wanted to do. I did not want a race that would allow me to accumulate miles for 54 hours.
Finally, a friend mentioned Ghost Train in Brookline, NH. The format is similar to most 100 milers, and many of the people are there to run 100 miles. But, it's on a 7.5 mile stretch of rail trail, and you do out-and-backs on the trail. For this race, you can choose to do 30 miles, 45, 60, 75, 90 or 100. It might even be possible to shoot for 105 or 120 or more, but I didn't really look into that option.
I told my wife about it and said that I thought 30 miles would be a good goal. I believe that it was my wife who suggested that with a 30 hour time limit, 45 miles should be possible. And, she offered to do it with me. My wife has done 3 marathons - 2 on trail and 1 on the road. She has paced 30 miles at the VT100. But, she had never done an ultra. At the time, I felt like she was simply trying to encourage me, and I honestly never expected her to do the race.
So, last February, I contacted the RD so we could reserve one of the camping spaces at the start/finish area. He said he was surprised by my early request, because registration wasn't even open. I explained the cancer story behind my request, and he responded quickly that we had a camping spot.
And then, I screwed up. I didn't sign up for the race right away. And, it filled up before I tried to enter. Luckily, there is a waiting list and we were told it was very likely we would get in if we signed up immediately for the waiting list. In August, we got confirmation that we were in the race.
So, after 6 years away from ultras, and not being much of a runner any more, how does one train for an ultra. In one respect, I could say we didn't. That would be sort of true. My longest day was a 5 mile walk/run followed by a 3 mile dog walk. My wife's longest day was a hike of Mt. Hunger that took us a few hours for just over 4 hilly miles. I did that hike as well.
But, we did CrossFit all the time, we were doing a weekly aerobic capacity class at CF, and we did get out walking as much as possible. We just never really did any long walks.
Through the summer, we both saw our aerobic capacity improve through the one weekly class at CF, plus running in regular CF classes, and our weekend walks. And suddenly, it was almost race time and we lamented that we'd not even done a 10 mile walk all summer. How would this work out?
We left work early last Friday, trying to get to the race starting area in a lull during a rainy day. We got our tent set up quickly in some light rain, and things stayed mostly dry. We went to the pre-race dinner with friends. After dinner, it was absolutely pouring. We drove back to our tent. For 20 minutes, we sat in the car, looking at the rain and the frequent lightning, wondering what to do. I told my wife that I just wanted to drive home, leaving the tent and everything behind. That wasn't realistic, but I wanted nothing to do with the rain.
Finally, I suggested finding a hotel for the night to avoid the worst of the weather. I hated to spend the money when I had a free tent spot, but it allowed us to keep everything dry, we could shower in the morning, we would have access to coffee, and we would get a real night of sleep in a warm dry bed. My wife even enjoyed a couple beers in the hotel bar before we went to bed.
We got up at 6:30 on Saturday morning, got some coffee, showered, got dressed, and had some more coffee. By 7:30, we were parked beside our tent, and ready to go. We got our race numbers, socialized with friends, and got ready for a long, long walk.
Just after 9:00, we were off. We had started near the back, but we still got passed by a few people early on. By 9:30, we were sure we were dead last, but one runner was late for the start and passed us a bit later. After she passed us, we were all alone.
At this point, it became like any other ultra. Keep moving. Pay attention to your feet. Eat. Drink. Repeat. We finished the first 15 miles at about 2:45. We grabbed our headlamps and flashlights and headed out for a second lap. This one started out faster than the first had, but we definitely slowed down in the darkness during the last 7.5 miles. We were 10 minutes slower on lap #2 than we had been on the first. We finished a the second loop at about 8:40. From there, we changed clothes and headed to Nashua for some dinner. My stomach was off a bit and I struggled to eat a bowl of clam chowder. My wife had no such problems (she did say her stomach felt a bit queasy, but I'm not sure I'm buying it), as she ate a burger and fries and drank a beer.
We got back to the tent later than I'd hoped, and we went straight to sleep. We set our alarm for a bit before 7:00. The goal was coffee and breakfast at 7:00 and we would start hiking at 8:00. But, we were both tired. Sore. Blistered. Sleep-deprived. We talked around the issue of not going out again. In the end, I think we both wanted to bail, but neither of us would say it first. So, a little bit after 8:00, we started our final lap.
We were moving OK to start, but by mile 5, I was slowing down. The turnaround boosted our spirits a bit, but we still had 7.5 miles to go. But again, like every ultra, you just keep moving and you will eventually get there. I did have the additional worry of making sure we would finish by the 30 hour cut-off, but we had plenty of cushion and we made it easily.
Our total elapsed time for 45 miles was 29:25. Our "time on feet" was under 18 hours, but not by a lot.
I have a couple nasty blisters. So does my wife. We went to CrossFit on Tuesday and rowed a 5K time trial, but I had nothing. I should have been able to do this in close to 21 flat, but it took me 22:22.2. My wife worked hard to get under 30 minutes. Being short is a huge disadvantage on the rower for my wife.
We rested again on Wednesday, and I think we are going to try CrossFit at an easy level tonight.
Killington opened the east coast ski season this week. I have new skis and I will start work at Sugarbush in a few weeks. In the interim, maybe I'll get out to fly fish for a bit, or maybe not. Right now, I just want to recover from the race and get ready to ski.
After the race was over, my wife did suggest that we come back and try 60 miles next year. I'm willing to give it a shot, I think. Maybe. Probably?
Last winter, during chemo, I floated the idea of an ultra to my wife. There was (and still is) so much uncertainty related to my liposarcoma, and I needed to plan something. Mentally, I needed to know that I could still plan ahead in my life, prepare for something, and have it happen. It might not make sense to most people, but I'm sure every cancer patient would understand.
My first thought was to do the 50K at the Maine Track Club 50K/50M. This has been a favorite race of mine in the past, but I found out that it's now been discontinued. My thought was that I could do 50K in the 50 mile time limit, so I could finish. With that race gone, my options seemed more limited.
I briefly considered A Race For The Ages, but that was more than I wanted to do. I did not want a race that would allow me to accumulate miles for 54 hours.
Finally, a friend mentioned Ghost Train in Brookline, NH. The format is similar to most 100 milers, and many of the people are there to run 100 miles. But, it's on a 7.5 mile stretch of rail trail, and you do out-and-backs on the trail. For this race, you can choose to do 30 miles, 45, 60, 75, 90 or 100. It might even be possible to shoot for 105 or 120 or more, but I didn't really look into that option.
I told my wife about it and said that I thought 30 miles would be a good goal. I believe that it was my wife who suggested that with a 30 hour time limit, 45 miles should be possible. And, she offered to do it with me. My wife has done 3 marathons - 2 on trail and 1 on the road. She has paced 30 miles at the VT100. But, she had never done an ultra. At the time, I felt like she was simply trying to encourage me, and I honestly never expected her to do the race.
So, last February, I contacted the RD so we could reserve one of the camping spaces at the start/finish area. He said he was surprised by my early request, because registration wasn't even open. I explained the cancer story behind my request, and he responded quickly that we had a camping spot.
And then, I screwed up. I didn't sign up for the race right away. And, it filled up before I tried to enter. Luckily, there is a waiting list and we were told it was very likely we would get in if we signed up immediately for the waiting list. In August, we got confirmation that we were in the race.
So, after 6 years away from ultras, and not being much of a runner any more, how does one train for an ultra. In one respect, I could say we didn't. That would be sort of true. My longest day was a 5 mile walk/run followed by a 3 mile dog walk. My wife's longest day was a hike of Mt. Hunger that took us a few hours for just over 4 hilly miles. I did that hike as well.
But, we did CrossFit all the time, we were doing a weekly aerobic capacity class at CF, and we did get out walking as much as possible. We just never really did any long walks.
Through the summer, we both saw our aerobic capacity improve through the one weekly class at CF, plus running in regular CF classes, and our weekend walks. And suddenly, it was almost race time and we lamented that we'd not even done a 10 mile walk all summer. How would this work out?
We left work early last Friday, trying to get to the race starting area in a lull during a rainy day. We got our tent set up quickly in some light rain, and things stayed mostly dry. We went to the pre-race dinner with friends. After dinner, it was absolutely pouring. We drove back to our tent. For 20 minutes, we sat in the car, looking at the rain and the frequent lightning, wondering what to do. I told my wife that I just wanted to drive home, leaving the tent and everything behind. That wasn't realistic, but I wanted nothing to do with the rain.
Finally, I suggested finding a hotel for the night to avoid the worst of the weather. I hated to spend the money when I had a free tent spot, but it allowed us to keep everything dry, we could shower in the morning, we would have access to coffee, and we would get a real night of sleep in a warm dry bed. My wife even enjoyed a couple beers in the hotel bar before we went to bed.
We got up at 6:30 on Saturday morning, got some coffee, showered, got dressed, and had some more coffee. By 7:30, we were parked beside our tent, and ready to go. We got our race numbers, socialized with friends, and got ready for a long, long walk.
Just after 9:00, we were off. We had started near the back, but we still got passed by a few people early on. By 9:30, we were sure we were dead last, but one runner was late for the start and passed us a bit later. After she passed us, we were all alone.
At this point, it became like any other ultra. Keep moving. Pay attention to your feet. Eat. Drink. Repeat. We finished the first 15 miles at about 2:45. We grabbed our headlamps and flashlights and headed out for a second lap. This one started out faster than the first had, but we definitely slowed down in the darkness during the last 7.5 miles. We were 10 minutes slower on lap #2 than we had been on the first. We finished a the second loop at about 8:40. From there, we changed clothes and headed to Nashua for some dinner. My stomach was off a bit and I struggled to eat a bowl of clam chowder. My wife had no such problems (she did say her stomach felt a bit queasy, but I'm not sure I'm buying it), as she ate a burger and fries and drank a beer.
We got back to the tent later than I'd hoped, and we went straight to sleep. We set our alarm for a bit before 7:00. The goal was coffee and breakfast at 7:00 and we would start hiking at 8:00. But, we were both tired. Sore. Blistered. Sleep-deprived. We talked around the issue of not going out again. In the end, I think we both wanted to bail, but neither of us would say it first. So, a little bit after 8:00, we started our final lap.
We were moving OK to start, but by mile 5, I was slowing down. The turnaround boosted our spirits a bit, but we still had 7.5 miles to go. But again, like every ultra, you just keep moving and you will eventually get there. I did have the additional worry of making sure we would finish by the 30 hour cut-off, but we had plenty of cushion and we made it easily.
Our total elapsed time for 45 miles was 29:25. Our "time on feet" was under 18 hours, but not by a lot.
I have a couple nasty blisters. So does my wife. We went to CrossFit on Tuesday and rowed a 5K time trial, but I had nothing. I should have been able to do this in close to 21 flat, but it took me 22:22.2. My wife worked hard to get under 30 minutes. Being short is a huge disadvantage on the rower for my wife.
We rested again on Wednesday, and I think we are going to try CrossFit at an easy level tonight.
Killington opened the east coast ski season this week. I have new skis and I will start work at Sugarbush in a few weeks. In the interim, maybe I'll get out to fly fish for a bit, or maybe not. Right now, I just want to recover from the race and get ready to ski.
After the race was over, my wife did suggest that we come back and try 60 miles next year. I'm willing to give it a shot, I think. Maybe. Probably?
Friday, October 7, 2016
Another long absence, but it's due to a lack of anything interesting to say
Things are going pretty well these days. I mean, life isn't without challenges, and after a cancer diagnosis like I got at this time last year, things will never be exactly the same. But, right this minute, I can't complain.
I was doing some PT to help with swelling and pain after my last surgery. Early on, I seemed to find some benefit, but as time wore on, the sessions seemed to hurt more and provide less benefit. The therapist was doing lots of dry needling in scar tissue, and I was finding myself taking pain medication just to get through PT. In my last session, she hit something with a needle that had me almost jump off the table. So, we weren't really making much progress, and my primary reason for being there was to fix the muscle imbalance caused by the removal of most of my right psoas major muscle in March. My sprinting, deadlifts and back squats are all going well right now, and all 3 require hip extension that activates the psoas. So, I'm going to call it a success and move on.
Another reason that I'm stopping the PT is that I need time for some other medical help. After 2 cancers for me (3 surgeries, 4 inpatient chemo sessions) and 1 cancer for my wife (2 surgeries, a 3rd unrelated surgery, and a month of radiation), I am a mess at times, at least from an emotional perspective. I'm mad at times. I'm sad at times. I'm dealing with pain on a daily basis that will likely never go away. The local teaching hospital has therapists within their cancer center. These are people who only work with cancer patients and their families. So, after thinking this over for a while, and talking with my wife, we decided it might be a good idea for me to talk to a professional about all of what I've been through, and what may still lie ahead. Unlike a certain orange presidential candidate, I'm willing to admit that I need help, and I refuse to consider myself weak for needing that help. So, I'm taking the step. My first session this week was challenging. A lot came to head - a lot that I didn't even realize I was simply holding in and holding onto, and just one hour had me feeling better. I go back next week.
I still have another CT scan before ski season starts, but unless the cancer is back next month, I'm planning to teach skiing all winter this year. The timing was a bit tough from an equipment perspective, but I took the risk and bought new skis and bindings this week. The skis I wanted, the Nordica Enforcer 93s, have gotten such great press that I knew if I waited until after my scan, they would be sold out at the professional pricing level. So, I bought them now. Even in a worst case scenario, I should be able to sell them unused to a fellow ski instructor here in VT.
Unlike last year at this time, when I was recovering from a big time abdominal surgery, I am in a much better place this year and I was able to take my annual September fly fishing trip. If anyone cares about that, the link to my fishing blog is in the sidebar.
Work is busy, but our company continues to just hold on. I'm not a business development person, but the closest we are to a new contract right now is work that I've been doing with a company in Philadelphia. This all started when they wanted to sell me some development tools, but over time, their company goals changed, and we are really better suited to collaborate on projects. So, we are trying to introduce each other to our current customers and find ways to work together. If we don't have a new contract or two pretty soon, it's easy to imagine us not making it more than 6 more months, at best. Hopefully, it won't come to that, but we will see.
And, training continues to go OK. I have pretty much officially regained the weight I lost last year while sick, even the part I didn't want to come back. But, as I mentioned before, my workouts are going well, so I'm OK with things as they are.
I have gotten back to 375 pounds for the deadlift, vs. a best of 440 before I got sick. My back squat is up to 295 (for a double) and I'm sure I'll do a single at 315 this coming Monday. My Tuesday night aerobic capacity class is going well, and I'm really enjoying the days we do sprint work rather than baseline cardio work.
If I pull off my goal of 45 miles at the Ghost Train ultra in 2 weeks, this class will have been a major reason why. My longest training day is only 8.5 miles or so, and I'm planning to walk 45 miles over a 30 hour period. I even bought new running shoes - Altra Provisions. I had never used Altra shoes before, but I know they are very popular in the ultra world right now, and so far, I love them.
See - not much of note. I'm working, working out, fishing, thinking about skiing, dealing with the side effects of cancer, and just trying to get by. If I was a praying man, I would also be praying that we don't end up with an orange jackass for President, but I'm going to have to trust the voters to do the right thing there. I have to admit, and this is somewhat maudlin, that I've been wondering if this will be my last time voting for POTUS. I will be in NYC on election day (second time in a row), so I need to vote early. We have too many important state and local races to even consider sitting this one out.
I was doing some PT to help with swelling and pain after my last surgery. Early on, I seemed to find some benefit, but as time wore on, the sessions seemed to hurt more and provide less benefit. The therapist was doing lots of dry needling in scar tissue, and I was finding myself taking pain medication just to get through PT. In my last session, she hit something with a needle that had me almost jump off the table. So, we weren't really making much progress, and my primary reason for being there was to fix the muscle imbalance caused by the removal of most of my right psoas major muscle in March. My sprinting, deadlifts and back squats are all going well right now, and all 3 require hip extension that activates the psoas. So, I'm going to call it a success and move on.
Another reason that I'm stopping the PT is that I need time for some other medical help. After 2 cancers for me (3 surgeries, 4 inpatient chemo sessions) and 1 cancer for my wife (2 surgeries, a 3rd unrelated surgery, and a month of radiation), I am a mess at times, at least from an emotional perspective. I'm mad at times. I'm sad at times. I'm dealing with pain on a daily basis that will likely never go away. The local teaching hospital has therapists within their cancer center. These are people who only work with cancer patients and their families. So, after thinking this over for a while, and talking with my wife, we decided it might be a good idea for me to talk to a professional about all of what I've been through, and what may still lie ahead. Unlike a certain orange presidential candidate, I'm willing to admit that I need help, and I refuse to consider myself weak for needing that help. So, I'm taking the step. My first session this week was challenging. A lot came to head - a lot that I didn't even realize I was simply holding in and holding onto, and just one hour had me feeling better. I go back next week.
I still have another CT scan before ski season starts, but unless the cancer is back next month, I'm planning to teach skiing all winter this year. The timing was a bit tough from an equipment perspective, but I took the risk and bought new skis and bindings this week. The skis I wanted, the Nordica Enforcer 93s, have gotten such great press that I knew if I waited until after my scan, they would be sold out at the professional pricing level. So, I bought them now. Even in a worst case scenario, I should be able to sell them unused to a fellow ski instructor here in VT.
Unlike last year at this time, when I was recovering from a big time abdominal surgery, I am in a much better place this year and I was able to take my annual September fly fishing trip. If anyone cares about that, the link to my fishing blog is in the sidebar.
Work is busy, but our company continues to just hold on. I'm not a business development person, but the closest we are to a new contract right now is work that I've been doing with a company in Philadelphia. This all started when they wanted to sell me some development tools, but over time, their company goals changed, and we are really better suited to collaborate on projects. So, we are trying to introduce each other to our current customers and find ways to work together. If we don't have a new contract or two pretty soon, it's easy to imagine us not making it more than 6 more months, at best. Hopefully, it won't come to that, but we will see.
And, training continues to go OK. I have pretty much officially regained the weight I lost last year while sick, even the part I didn't want to come back. But, as I mentioned before, my workouts are going well, so I'm OK with things as they are.
I have gotten back to 375 pounds for the deadlift, vs. a best of 440 before I got sick. My back squat is up to 295 (for a double) and I'm sure I'll do a single at 315 this coming Monday. My Tuesday night aerobic capacity class is going well, and I'm really enjoying the days we do sprint work rather than baseline cardio work.
If I pull off my goal of 45 miles at the Ghost Train ultra in 2 weeks, this class will have been a major reason why. My longest training day is only 8.5 miles or so, and I'm planning to walk 45 miles over a 30 hour period. I even bought new running shoes - Altra Provisions. I had never used Altra shoes before, but I know they are very popular in the ultra world right now, and so far, I love them.
See - not much of note. I'm working, working out, fishing, thinking about skiing, dealing with the side effects of cancer, and just trying to get by. If I was a praying man, I would also be praying that we don't end up with an orange jackass for President, but I'm going to have to trust the voters to do the right thing there. I have to admit, and this is somewhat maudlin, that I've been wondering if this will be my last time voting for POTUS. I will be in NYC on election day (second time in a row), so I need to vote early. We have too many important state and local races to even consider sitting this one out.
Tuesday, September 13, 2016
Progress!
I had my last cancer treatment in early March. But, it was a surgery called a laparotomy, which entails a large incision in the abdomen and open (non-laparoscopic) surgery. While still in the hospital, I was already up and walking a lot. After my discharge from the hospital, I had to stay in NYC for a few days and I walked a lot on those days.
I got home and started walking on the treadmill while my wife did CrossFit. Within a month of surgery, I added some rowing, and two weeks after that, I slowly started getting back into CrossFit classes.
Even now, due to pain from scar tissue, some movements are still difficult - burpees, box jumps, rope jumping and running, plus kipping on a bar. But, I'm using some compression clothing to help with this, seeing a physical therapist, and using pain meds as needed to control the pain.
I've now been training, uninterrupted, since late April - almost 5 months. And things are finally starting to come around.
Last Friday, I finished off a deadlift workout with a single rep of 375. That's my heaviest deadlift in over 2 years. My lifetime PR of 440 was done 3 years ago.
Last night, I did a back squat at 295 - my heaviest back squat in 23 months. I think I might have been capable of doing 305 or 315. My lifetime PR of 375 was over 3 years ago.
I then ran a mile in 8:39. Not too fast, but my fastest in years.
I'm finally seeing some real progress and seeing my strength getting close to where it was.
I still have some things to get better at, but I'm encouraged by the progress.
On the downside, I haven't been doing any Olympic lifting. Well, a little bit, but more for volume than strength. We normally do Oly lifts on Tuesday, and I've been doing an Aerobic Capacity class that day instead.
Also, we've been doing back squats on Mondays and front squats on Fridays, but I'm opting to deadlift most Fridays. So, my front squat is lagging my back squat.
And, don't even ask about my bench press or strict press right now.
But, as long as I can train like I'm training now, all of these things will improve. It feels good to be on this side of the recovery and seeing real improvements from my training.
I got home and started walking on the treadmill while my wife did CrossFit. Within a month of surgery, I added some rowing, and two weeks after that, I slowly started getting back into CrossFit classes.
Even now, due to pain from scar tissue, some movements are still difficult - burpees, box jumps, rope jumping and running, plus kipping on a bar. But, I'm using some compression clothing to help with this, seeing a physical therapist, and using pain meds as needed to control the pain.
I've now been training, uninterrupted, since late April - almost 5 months. And things are finally starting to come around.
Last Friday, I finished off a deadlift workout with a single rep of 375. That's my heaviest deadlift in over 2 years. My lifetime PR of 440 was done 3 years ago.
Last night, I did a back squat at 295 - my heaviest back squat in 23 months. I think I might have been capable of doing 305 or 315. My lifetime PR of 375 was over 3 years ago.
I then ran a mile in 8:39. Not too fast, but my fastest in years.
I'm finally seeing some real progress and seeing my strength getting close to where it was.
I still have some things to get better at, but I'm encouraged by the progress.
On the downside, I haven't been doing any Olympic lifting. Well, a little bit, but more for volume than strength. We normally do Oly lifts on Tuesday, and I've been doing an Aerobic Capacity class that day instead.
Also, we've been doing back squats on Mondays and front squats on Fridays, but I'm opting to deadlift most Fridays. So, my front squat is lagging my back squat.
And, don't even ask about my bench press or strict press right now.
But, as long as I can train like I'm training now, all of these things will improve. It feels good to be on this side of the recovery and seeing real improvements from my training.
Tuesday, August 16, 2016
Too Busy to Post, and That's a Good Thing
I last posted in late May. I've been swamped since then, but to be honest, it's good stuff.
In May and into early June, I pretty much fished every second I wasn't at the gym or at work. And, I was at the gym a lot.
We had my daughter's high school graduation in May. Then, we took off to Lake Tahoe for a week of vacation. Vacation was spent with friends in a house they had rented at Lake Tahoe. We got in a couple days of fly fishing, a lot of mini golf, some disc golf, lots of hiking and walking, and a lot of great meals, plus some visits with friends who live in CA. At the end of the trip, we spent a day in San Francisco and saw a baseball game (the hated Giants won 8-7 over the Phillies, but it was a good game), and then we visited Amoeba Records - a store my son has always wanted to see.
As soon as we got home from CA, my wife and I showered, packed some clothes and headed to New York for my CT scan at Sloan Kettering. The scan was completely clean - my first clean scan since I first heard the word liposarcoma.
By mid-July, fishing was getting very tough due to a mild drought and very warm summer. It's been a few weeks now since I have fished, although I'm going to go way north to fix that problem this weekend.
I had a huge project at work. I had re-negotiated our primary IT contract with the company that provides our servers for us. This allowed me to consolidate some servers, add some security features, and make our systems more secure at a lower price than we were paying before. But, it took almost 6 weeks to plan and execute the cut-over to the new hardware and some new software versions.
About the time we finished that project, my wife and I had our 30th wedding anniversary. We had a really nice lunch in Boston the weekend before our anniversary, and we saw Bryan Ferry while we were there. The weekend after our anniversary, I cooked a nice dinner with my wife's family, and we opened some nice wines, including two Bordeaux from our wedding year, one of which was the amazing Mouton Rothschild. That wine is still too young at age 30, so I'm hoping to open our other bottle for our 40th anniversary. I'm already planning a bottle of 1986 Chateau Margaux for our 50th.
And now, the house is in chaos as my daughter is preparing to head off to Syracuse next week to start her freshman year of college
In the interim, we are just trying to enjoy life. I have my next CT scan in November, and if that one is clear, I will be clear for all of ski season. My wife and I are training a lot - in the gym and walking and (some) running on the weekends, plus a little bike riding for me.
So, we are busy doing the things we love, living life, trying not to think about cancer too much, and just appreciating being able to do these things. Life has been good.
We are still on the waiting list for the Ghost Train ultra in October. My wife and I have modest goals for that race - 45 miles over 36 hours for me, and probably 30 miles for my wife. We both intend to walk the entire time.
In May and into early June, I pretty much fished every second I wasn't at the gym or at work. And, I was at the gym a lot.
We had my daughter's high school graduation in May. Then, we took off to Lake Tahoe for a week of vacation. Vacation was spent with friends in a house they had rented at Lake Tahoe. We got in a couple days of fly fishing, a lot of mini golf, some disc golf, lots of hiking and walking, and a lot of great meals, plus some visits with friends who live in CA. At the end of the trip, we spent a day in San Francisco and saw a baseball game (the hated Giants won 8-7 over the Phillies, but it was a good game), and then we visited Amoeba Records - a store my son has always wanted to see.
As soon as we got home from CA, my wife and I showered, packed some clothes and headed to New York for my CT scan at Sloan Kettering. The scan was completely clean - my first clean scan since I first heard the word liposarcoma.
By mid-July, fishing was getting very tough due to a mild drought and very warm summer. It's been a few weeks now since I have fished, although I'm going to go way north to fix that problem this weekend.
I had a huge project at work. I had re-negotiated our primary IT contract with the company that provides our servers for us. This allowed me to consolidate some servers, add some security features, and make our systems more secure at a lower price than we were paying before. But, it took almost 6 weeks to plan and execute the cut-over to the new hardware and some new software versions.
About the time we finished that project, my wife and I had our 30th wedding anniversary. We had a really nice lunch in Boston the weekend before our anniversary, and we saw Bryan Ferry while we were there. The weekend after our anniversary, I cooked a nice dinner with my wife's family, and we opened some nice wines, including two Bordeaux from our wedding year, one of which was the amazing Mouton Rothschild. That wine is still too young at age 30, so I'm hoping to open our other bottle for our 40th anniversary. I'm already planning a bottle of 1986 Chateau Margaux for our 50th.
And now, the house is in chaos as my daughter is preparing to head off to Syracuse next week to start her freshman year of college
In the interim, we are just trying to enjoy life. I have my next CT scan in November, and if that one is clear, I will be clear for all of ski season. My wife and I are training a lot - in the gym and walking and (some) running on the weekends, plus a little bike riding for me.
So, we are busy doing the things we love, living life, trying not to think about cancer too much, and just appreciating being able to do these things. Life has been good.
We are still on the waiting list for the Ghost Train ultra in October. My wife and I have modest goals for that race - 45 miles over 36 hours for me, and probably 30 miles for my wife. We both intend to walk the entire time.
Thursday, May 26, 2016
Long time - no update
I am simply swamped. I haven't had time to write an update here in weeks.
I'm working out like crazy. My workouts at the gym are getting better. My deadlifts, bench presses and squats are all improving rapidly. I'm still far from my lifetime bests, but I'm back in the 70% range. Hopefully, this improvement will continue. I've been at CrossFit 3-4 days per week, walking or running on most days I'm not at CrossFit, and even on my rest days, I'm often spending hours fly fishing.
I'm doing more running and walking than I've done for years. I am even on the waitlist for an ultra in NH in October. It's a 36 hour long race, and my goal is modest - 45 miles over the 36 hours. I simply hope to walk (run a little maybe) 30 miles on the first day, get some food, a shower, and some sleep and then walk 15 more the next morning.
I've been losing sleep to the hockey playoffs, which doesn't help me in terms of time management. Being a fan of a west coast team who is finally going to the Stanley Cup finals has been draining. I can't tell you how many games I've managed to miss because I fell asleep on the couch watching them. If Pittsburgh wins their game 7, I may have a shot to go to a game in Pittsburgh next week. No matter which team wins, the finals will mostly be in the eastern time zone, so I might be able to stay awake to see a few games.
On the down side, I still seem to be slightly anemic. I have to get my chemo port flushed next week (they do it every 6-8 weeks to make sure clots aren't developing in the port where it enters your vein. I'm going to have the lab draw blood for a CBC next week, to see if the anemia has resolved at all. And, I'm still dealing with pain. I see the doctor about that tomorrow, but I'm guessing the answer is going to be to "deal with it". I'm not sure there is a better answer after three major abdominal surgeries in the past 30 months. I'm guessing there is just going to be pain at times. Regretfully, every workout, especially running, leaves me in some level of pain. It hasn't stopped me from working out, but it takes some of the fun out of the training, knowing I'll be hurting after it's over.
Life is also crazy with my daughter. She is winding down her senior year of high school. Last night was her final lacrosse game in high school, and the end of her high school athletic career. She had her best season ever, although the team didn't do great. They got doubled up by an arch rival last night, which left her pretty unhappy.
Tonight, we get to see her completed senior project. There are a few awards events to go to. Graduation is in just over 3 weeks, and she's mostly done with classes and tests, but the events for the seniors are coming in waves.
But, I'm excited for her to get to this point, and I know she's excited about heading off to Syracuse in the fall.
And soon, we get to go on our first family vacation in years. We'll be off to Lake Tahoe for a week. I'll get to fish in the Sierra Nevada, we will hike a lot, and I'm guessing there will be plenty of mini golf. Plus, we will get to see some friends that we haven't seen in years.
I'm working out like crazy. My workouts at the gym are getting better. My deadlifts, bench presses and squats are all improving rapidly. I'm still far from my lifetime bests, but I'm back in the 70% range. Hopefully, this improvement will continue. I've been at CrossFit 3-4 days per week, walking or running on most days I'm not at CrossFit, and even on my rest days, I'm often spending hours fly fishing.
I'm doing more running and walking than I've done for years. I am even on the waitlist for an ultra in NH in October. It's a 36 hour long race, and my goal is modest - 45 miles over the 36 hours. I simply hope to walk (run a little maybe) 30 miles on the first day, get some food, a shower, and some sleep and then walk 15 more the next morning.
I've been losing sleep to the hockey playoffs, which doesn't help me in terms of time management. Being a fan of a west coast team who is finally going to the Stanley Cup finals has been draining. I can't tell you how many games I've managed to miss because I fell asleep on the couch watching them. If Pittsburgh wins their game 7, I may have a shot to go to a game in Pittsburgh next week. No matter which team wins, the finals will mostly be in the eastern time zone, so I might be able to stay awake to see a few games.
On the down side, I still seem to be slightly anemic. I have to get my chemo port flushed next week (they do it every 6-8 weeks to make sure clots aren't developing in the port where it enters your vein. I'm going to have the lab draw blood for a CBC next week, to see if the anemia has resolved at all. And, I'm still dealing with pain. I see the doctor about that tomorrow, but I'm guessing the answer is going to be to "deal with it". I'm not sure there is a better answer after three major abdominal surgeries in the past 30 months. I'm guessing there is just going to be pain at times. Regretfully, every workout, especially running, leaves me in some level of pain. It hasn't stopped me from working out, but it takes some of the fun out of the training, knowing I'll be hurting after it's over.
Life is also crazy with my daughter. She is winding down her senior year of high school. Last night was her final lacrosse game in high school, and the end of her high school athletic career. She had her best season ever, although the team didn't do great. They got doubled up by an arch rival last night, which left her pretty unhappy.
Tonight, we get to see her completed senior project. There are a few awards events to go to. Graduation is in just over 3 weeks, and she's mostly done with classes and tests, but the events for the seniors are coming in waves.
But, I'm excited for her to get to this point, and I know she's excited about heading off to Syracuse in the fall.
And soon, we get to go on our first family vacation in years. We'll be off to Lake Tahoe for a week. I'll get to fish in the Sierra Nevada, we will hike a lot, and I'm guessing there will be plenty of mini golf. Plus, we will get to see some friends that we haven't seen in years.
Tuesday, May 3, 2016
More training stuff
I ended up skipping CrossFit last Monday night. After being very active all weekend and the week before, I was tired. I walked for just over an hour while my wife did the CrossFit class.
On Tuesday, I felt a lot better, but for strength work, I opted for the squats I'd missed on Monday instead of Olympic lifting. I did sets of 2 reps from 95 pounds to 155 pounds, and then singles from 165 to 225. That last lift was my heaviest back squat since last May and it didn't feel too bad. I could have gone higher if I hadn't done so many reps by then. My lifetime max is 375, and I'm guessing I could do 245-255 right now. After the squats, I did a scaled version of the "Hero WOD" DT:
"DT"
Five rounds for time of:
155 pound Deadlift, 12 reps
155 pound Hang power clean, 9 reps
155 pound Push jerk, 6 reps
I used only 73 pounds. My time and barbell weight were nearly identical to the last time I did this workout.
On Wednesday, we started off with push presses and I started at 75 pounds and increased until 120 pounds. My best here is 188, so I was far from that number. After that, we did a variety of things - ring rows, dumbbell floor presses, sit-ups, box jump-overs (I did step-overs), and wall balls.
By Thursday, my wife was exhausted, and I'd worked out at some level for 10 straight days, so we took a rest day.
On Friday, we started with deadlifts. I did 5x5 at 235 pounds - more than I expected I could do. I'm sure I could pull 315 for a single rep right now, but I was happy with this weight for 5x5. Then, some superman holds, rope jumping, goblet squats and sit-ups. The sit-ups were my first since surgery and they were a bit uncomfortable.
On Saturday, I had an early walk to breakfast with my wife and a friend. Then, a 4 mile walk with the dog later in the day. And finally, fishing in the evening. I registered 18,000 steps on my FitBit, but nothing was super-strenuous.
On Sunday, it was raining and chilly, but I really needed to do something. So, I put on my running shoes and went for a very slow 4 mile run. It had been close to 2 years since I'd run that far, and I was really slow, but felt OK. My HR was really high for the slow pace, but I felt pretty good out there.
Yesterday, we did a new class at CrossFit aimed at mobility and aerobic training, rather than the anaerobic work we do so often. We were supposed to keep our heart rates at or below 180 minus age for a combination of running, agility movements, and walking with kettlebells overhead. I had to really go slow on the runs to keep my heart rate anywhere close to the goal. To be honest, the workout wasn't too tough, and I wish I'd had time to do some strength work afterward. But, with an hour commute home after CrossFit, I simply can't stay in the gym until 8:00 at night.
Tonight, I'll do squats rather than Olympic lifting, just like last Tuesday.
I'm still dealing with some pain and general discomfort from the surgery, but it gets better all the time. I think I'm at the point where I'm now willing to train at my limits, rather than forcing myself to go easy. The main problem is that my limits aren't that good right now. I've got a lot of work to do to get back to where I was 14-18 months ago, before I started to get noticeably sick.
On Tuesday, I felt a lot better, but for strength work, I opted for the squats I'd missed on Monday instead of Olympic lifting. I did sets of 2 reps from 95 pounds to 155 pounds, and then singles from 165 to 225. That last lift was my heaviest back squat since last May and it didn't feel too bad. I could have gone higher if I hadn't done so many reps by then. My lifetime max is 375, and I'm guessing I could do 245-255 right now. After the squats, I did a scaled version of the "Hero WOD" DT:
"DT"
Five rounds for time of:
155 pound Deadlift, 12 reps
155 pound Hang power clean, 9 reps
155 pound Push jerk, 6 reps
I used only 73 pounds. My time and barbell weight were nearly identical to the last time I did this workout.
On Wednesday, we started off with push presses and I started at 75 pounds and increased until 120 pounds. My best here is 188, so I was far from that number. After that, we did a variety of things - ring rows, dumbbell floor presses, sit-ups, box jump-overs (I did step-overs), and wall balls.
By Thursday, my wife was exhausted, and I'd worked out at some level for 10 straight days, so we took a rest day.
On Friday, we started with deadlifts. I did 5x5 at 235 pounds - more than I expected I could do. I'm sure I could pull 315 for a single rep right now, but I was happy with this weight for 5x5. Then, some superman holds, rope jumping, goblet squats and sit-ups. The sit-ups were my first since surgery and they were a bit uncomfortable.
On Saturday, I had an early walk to breakfast with my wife and a friend. Then, a 4 mile walk with the dog later in the day. And finally, fishing in the evening. I registered 18,000 steps on my FitBit, but nothing was super-strenuous.
On Sunday, it was raining and chilly, but I really needed to do something. So, I put on my running shoes and went for a very slow 4 mile run. It had been close to 2 years since I'd run that far, and I was really slow, but felt OK. My HR was really high for the slow pace, but I felt pretty good out there.
Yesterday, we did a new class at CrossFit aimed at mobility and aerobic training, rather than the anaerobic work we do so often. We were supposed to keep our heart rates at or below 180 minus age for a combination of running, agility movements, and walking with kettlebells overhead. I had to really go slow on the runs to keep my heart rate anywhere close to the goal. To be honest, the workout wasn't too tough, and I wish I'd had time to do some strength work afterward. But, with an hour commute home after CrossFit, I simply can't stay in the gym until 8:00 at night.
Tonight, I'll do squats rather than Olympic lifting, just like last Tuesday.
I'm still dealing with some pain and general discomfort from the surgery, but it gets better all the time. I think I'm at the point where I'm now willing to train at my limits, rather than forcing myself to go easy. The main problem is that my limits aren't that good right now. I've got a lot of work to do to get back to where I was 14-18 months ago, before I started to get noticeably sick.
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